Things we brought or wish we had

I'm taking re-entry slow and sticking with an easy topic.

Personally, I felt we did a bang-up job with packing things for our son for the first trip.  Keep in mind he is twenty months old, and not all these things will work for other ages, but they may spark some ideas for those of you that are dreaming about your first trip.

1.  Books.  We brought several board books, some in Spanish and some in English.  I don't think it much mattered which language they were, but it was nice to have both.  The ones about trucks were a hit (a picture book about trucks, and a story about a little blue truck).  I haven't met a little boy that didn't like to look a pictures of trucks.  He also liked the animal ones pretty well (Baby Beluga, and an animal picture book).  I was surprised how much he also liked the ones that were sung (Snuggle Puppy and some others).  He kept picking Snuggle Puppy out of the pile for me to sing, which I thought was really really sweet.

2.  Photos.  We brought a little photo album that he could page through, just a simple little one where the pictures slide in.  We included pictures of the four of us, several pictures of the boys, our house, a couple of the extended family, and mostly just fun-looking shots of the four of us or the boys.  He looked at it the photos a fair bit and also was just plain interested in turning the pages.  I also just happened to have the photo album in my purse when we went for the interviews with the social worker and the psychologist, and as I was answering a question from the social worker, I remembered the photos and asked if she wanted to see them.  She did, and I think it helped her to get a visual of what I was talking about, and also helped her to see our family situation.  I also brought it to the first meeting with our son, and showed the photos to his foster mother, who seemed to be very happy to be able to look at them.  I hadn't really given it any thought in advance that I would show her the photos, but in hindsight, I'm very glad I did.  She has been raising our son for his entire life.  Of course she loves him and wants what is best for him, so for her to meet us and get to know us a little bit, it really helped to show her some photos of the boys, our house, the playset in the yard, etc.  I don't mean in a wow-look-at-our-big-house-and-all-our-stuff kind of way, but that we have fun, we play on the swingset, we run around, we paint, we go places, we love each other, etc.  If it were me, I think that is might have put me more at ease.  I don't think the foster mothers get much if any information on the families.  I also had a toddler-type soft plastic photo album that had space for about six photos, which I left with our son.  I put a couple of the ones from our family, and then filled the other spots with photos of Jerry and I and our new little guy so he could maybe (hopefully) remember us.  Before having kids, I would have said the album was kid-proof.  Now I say that it is pretty tough and will hold up to some wear.  Ain't no such thing as kid-proof.

3.  Cameras.  I take a lot of photos so it was a no-brainer to bring my camera, but I also brought three disposable cameras that I left with our son's foster mother.  I asked her if she would take photos of our son until we come for our pickup trip, but also photos of her, the other people in the home, the home itself, things to help our son remember and to have a record of when he grows up.  I think his foster mother was happy to do that.

4.  Bubbles.  I don't know any child that doesn't like bubbles.

5.  Balloons.  ditto, and they take up very little space.

6.  Crayons and a coloring book.  Our guy hadn't used crayons much before, but he seemed to enjoy trying.  It was fun watching him draw so hard like really little kids do.  Mostly he enjoyed taking the crayons in and out of the box over and over again.

7.  Balls.  Oh yeah.  Ileana suggested bringing just a few toys when we went to meet our son.  A ball was the first thing I grabbed, and it was the first thing for him too.  He held on to it right away, and didn't let it go for at least thirty minutes, and that was only so he could pick up something else.  We played ball a lot.  He can actually throw the ball overhand quite well, and can catch it sometimes if you toss it to his belly, so someone has certainly been playing ball with him.  He kicked it around too a bit.

8.  Truck.  Oh yeah, again.  Boys and trucks:  need I say more?  Because of his young age, I didn't want to bring Hot Wheels-type cars with little wheels that could come off, but we had a push-type car where you press on the driver's head and the car zooms along.  We played with this a lot too.

9.  Stacking cups.  When packing, I thought the stacking cups would get used a bit, but they were played with a lot.  He just kept trying to fit them in again and again.  At first he wasn't very good and would try to fit one way too big into a small one, but by the end of the trip he got the hang of it rather decently.  Plus I could make a tower out of them and the truck could barrel into it over and over and over.

10.  A train.  We call it the baby train in our house, not to be confused with the wooden trains we have tons of as well.  This one is more of a starter train.  It is plastic, Fisher-Price.  Just the engine and two cars, one which holds a lion and the other a giraffe.  If you press down on the smokestack, it toots, but it is very simple.  Just goes around and around, and we played with it a lot.  The lion and giraffe were played with a lot too -- remember the roaring that our guy did, both with the lion and the giraffe?  The lion and giraffe also climbed the stacking cup tower and kicked the ball and tried to ride in the truck.  They were busy little guys too.

11.  A pull toy and blocks.  I reviewed some of our Parents as Teachers materials before our trip to help think about developmentally-appropriate ideas, and I read that pull toys were big things for the 14-24 month age.  Once they can walk around pretty well, they like to bring things along too.  We have a wooden crane with a cart that holds blocks and is pulled around by a string.  It is so way cool because not only is it a pull toy, but the cart can be detached from the crane and just be pushed along like a car.  And it holds blocks (cubes, cylinders, and triangle prisms which have to fit in their correct spot) that are magnetic and can be picked up by the crane.  It must be one of those genius toys because it can do so many things.  It is heavy because it is so sturdy, but it was worth the weight because we played with it quite a bit.

12.  Echo microphone.  Our guy is not much of a talker yet, but he did like carrying it around, and he got a big kick out of me talking or singing into it.  He's got a goofy mommy, what can I say.

13.  Bottle, sippy cup, or plastic cup.  The hotel has glasses, so it was good to have something non breakable for a little one.  We brought a sippy cup, which was good, but did not have a bottle since we didn't think the little guy would be staying with us.  We have plenty at home, so easily could have brought one, and I wish we had.  Ileana was able to get one at the mall when she speedy shopped for us, but the one she ended up getting must have had a newborn nipple on it.  If we had just brought one from home, we would have definitely had the older baby nipple on it with the four five holes on the top, not just one, so I wish I had just brought it.  No big deal, because we opened the hole a little bigger, and used the sippy as much as possible, but next time I know what I'll bring.

14.  Diapers and wipes.  We did not bring these, but it sure would have been good to have even just a few diapers and a travel pack of wipes.  Again, they are easily purchased at the mall, but I wish we had had even just a few.

15.  Clothes.  Same as diapers -- we didn't have any for him, and wish we had, even just two outfits, a pair of pajamas and socks.

Processing, processing

Any Star Trek Next Generation fans out there?

Anybody???

Just me and the hubby eh?  Oh well....

In case there are any closet fans out there, remember when someone would ask Data a question that was a very hard one to answer?  He was some kind of supercomputer android kind of thing, so he mostly knew everything at the tip of his pasty white fingertips.  But there were some things that even the likes of Data could not put into words right away.  He would stand there saying "Processing....processing...." while his eyes would skip back and forth, "thinking" of what the answer was supposed to be.

Well, I am processing...processing...

Yesterday was our travelling home day, and the best two things about it were: 1) seeing Mario and Erik again, and 2) being one day closer to being able to return to Honduras to finalize little mister's adoption.

Our travels went fine; no complaints about anything.  I just can't seem to get the words to string together to adequately describe this first trip experience, not just yet.

I'll try again in a few days after my brain has processed a while, but I do want to say thank you so extremely much for all your prayers to make last week go so wonderfully, both here at home and on the trip.  The whole trip exceeded any hopes that we could possibly have had, and we are very grateful for all of you.

Trip 1, Day 5: Sad day

Ok, this is going to be a hard one to write about, but I will do my best to record it.

We all slept very well again last night, but woke up to tears this morning from the little guy.  He woke up, looked at us, looked around, and started to cry.  He had done the same the previous morning, only this time, it was quite a bit harder to calm him down.  He did rally, though, and gave us some smiles and a couple laughs.  He has been expressing his opinions rather well for a non-talker, and we are of course paying close attention to every little sign.

We went down for breakfast, and he didn't have much of an appetite. He ate a bit of the pancake, maybe about a silver dollar size, and some fruit, but that was about it.  Very little to drink.  We headed back up to our rooftop toddler party palace, and the tears started to flow some more.  We pulled out every trick we had and all our toys, but he was a sad one today.  It surprised us, but then again, not too much.  We were more expecting this kind of sadness yesterday, but had a fabulous day then instead.  Every kid is different, of course, and every situation is different, and I guess this was the day for some sadness.  With someone his age, we couldn't really ask him what was the matter.  We just assumed it was him missing his foster mother, but then again:  was it the wrong kind of formula?  Was it the wrong kind of nipple on the bottle?  Did he really not like pancakes?  Was he working out a #2, and having a rough go of it because of being in a new place and not knowing what was going on, and eating such a huge breakfast yesterday?  It could have been any of those things really, but we were really thinking it was just sadness.

I remembered back when Mario and Erik were really young.  Mario was 3 and Erik 2.  I was volunteering for Vacation Bible School at our parish.  I put them in Junior Camp for the week, which was set up for the little kiddos of parents volunteering at the camp.  They were not very used to being without me, but everyone gave them lots of positive attention and plenty of popsicles.  They did ok for about a day or two, Mario better than Erik, but after that, they didn't want to get far away from me at all.  They had just had it after a certain amount of time, and then would not leave my side, even if it meant walking back and forth the field with me 100 times.  So, I was thinking today that our little guy was maybe experiencing something like that.  He just really wanted his foster mother back.

Anyway, we pulled out everything from our bag of tricks, and nothing much worked other than holding him and walking around and around and around.  Jerry took a shift, then me, then Jerry, then me, through much of the morning.  Even still, tears and sobs would appear.  At one point while Jerry was holding him he fell asleep.  It was nowhere near naptime, but we did not argue!  Jerry managed to sit down with him for a little while, but after maybe fifteen minutes I think, he woke up again, and sobbed.  We even saw some anger this morning.  We would try to distract him with a toy or whatever, and he would get all red in the face and arch his back and holler loud that he was not amused.  Nothing was really working.  Not that we are the best parents in the entire world, I'm sure, but we are experienced parents of two other boys, and have a few tricks in our bags.  He fell asleep again during one of my walking around shifts, and I managed to lie down on the sofa with him.  We stayed put for probably a couple hours which is amazing but true.

I just lay back listening to the sounds:  our little one's breathing, the literally never-ending sound of car horns honking, car alarms going off, police or maybe ambulance sirens blaring, motorcycle engines reving.  I even heard the ice cream man coming by pushing his cart with his bells jingling.  There was also some banging like hammering happening somewhere nearby.  Mostly though it was the sounds of traffic.  The breeze felt nice and managed to keep me relatively cool, considering that I had a sleeping toddler on my tummy for two hours.

During one of the prolonged crying spells of the morning, we called Ileana to see if she could arrange it with the foster mother to come earlier.  As much as we wanted to spend as much time with our son as we could, we didn't want to unnecessarily prolong his sadness.  It being Saturday morning, his foster mother was out at the market, though, and didn't make it much before the previously scheduled pickup time of 3:30.

It wasn't all tears and sadness, luckily.  We did get some smiles and games periodically, but after all the frivolity of Friday, it was not very much.  We expected that as soon as he saw his foster mother, he would just run to her and cling for dear life.  That didn't happen. He was quite tranquil.  When she arrived, I was walking around with him in my arms.  After a minute of him just not making any movement like he wanted to get down, I set him on the ground, thinking that then he would run to her.  That didn't happen either.  So, I picked him up again and walked over and set him in her arms.  It is making the tears want to fall from my eyes just thinking about it, but I am just going to try to continue and get it all down for the record.

We told her again and again how healthy we thought he looked and how it was obvious that she was taking excellent care of him.  We thanked her again and again.  Then we said goodbye, gave him another thousand kisses for the road, and they were gone.

I managed to hold off the tears until he was around the corner.

In a very kind attempt to boost my spirits, Ileana suggested that we go to KFC.  That's right:  Kentucky Fried Chicken.  Tegucigalpa has all sorts of fast food, I think every kind you can imagine.  And since I have already eaten KFC in eight countries, we joked with her earlier in the week that I would have to visit the Colonel in Tegus in order to make it nine countries.  She very thoughtfully suggested that we head over to KFC, which we did.

The Colonel did not disappoint.  I had the popcorn chicken with rice and beans on the side and a bisquit.  Lots of ice in my diet pepsi too.  They have a huge playplace for kids, and there were several birthday parties that we saw.  It was a nice diversion.

Let me talk some about Ileana.  She is absolutely wonderful.  I could not imagine doing this without her.  She has made everything happen for us:  driving, translating, sightseeing, shopping, everything, everything, everything, and she is really very very special.

So we're now back at the hotel.  We're just about all packed up, and are waiting to skype with the boys.  Our flight is tomorrow at noon.

Trip 1, Day 4: Play all day and go to court

We were so amazed that the little guy slept all night.  His foster mother had told us that he was a good sleeper, and he definitely was for us last night.  He woke up this morning to a few tears, as if he thought the whole experience the day before with us was a dream, and then realized it was true, and still didn't quite know what was going on.  We snuggled a little and then played, and he seemed content enough.  Breakfast downstairs:  wow is our guy a big eater!  He ate a big amount of eggs and banana and milk.  I would put a bit of food on the spoon and show it to him, and he would open his mouth wide like a baby bird.  The foster mother had said he was a good eater, and pretty well ate everything she gave him, and sure enough, he proved it this morning at breakfast.

Then we grabbed our bag of toys and headed up to the rooftop terrace for some play.  I think we hit a home run with the toys we brought, or else he is just such an amazingly fabulous boy that he loves everything.  Could be some of both.  Anyway, we just played and played all morning!  Then some friends of ours who are also adopting popped by the hotel, and we got to see them and their little sweetie.  They also brought us a big box of Cheerios, which were a big hit with our guy!

He ate the Cheerios, had some milk, and ate a bit of chicken and potato.  Not as much as he had for breakfast, but that is understandable considering how much he ate then.  We went back to our room for a brief nap.  A few tears, but really not much, and then he fell asleep.  Unfortunately we could not give him a very long nap, since we were scheduled to meet our attorney at court to sign papers.  He is not a big fan of the car, giving some whimpers and tears, but is soothed rather quickly.  We did our work at court -- which only took a brief amount of time -- and then drove back to the hotel.  That was the only other official thing we have to do on this trip.  From now on, we're just hanging out with our little honey, until it is time for his foster mother to pick him up on Saturday.  But we still have him for several more hours!

We love our space on the roof and headed back up there for more playtime.  I don't even know how it happened, but it was like his little personality started to come out.  Where previously he had been quiet, he was more engaged.  We saw tons of smiles, heard plenty of giggles, and just watched him blossom.  It was so beautiful to see this side of him.  He has this thing where he will hold up his index finger and put it to the back of his ear, then bringing it out quickly to the front.  He would smile real big when he did it.  So Jerry and I did it too, and he was delighted!  Tons of giggles and he would do it again and again!  He even gave us a few roars when holding a little plastic lion we had brought.  He thought it was hysterical when he would hold the lion and roar, and we would act a little afraid and cover our faces.  I don't think he is too familiar with zoo animals though, because he was doing the same roaring thing with the giraffe, but that will be soon remedied when we are back in the States with him.  We'll go to the zoo as much as he wants!

After a while we headed down for dinner.  This time he ate some rice and beans, but again not a ton.  After a bit more play time, we got ready for bed.  He had a ball eating Cheerios and feeding some to Jerry.  He would even bite a Cheerio in two, and feed half to Jerry, which he thought was the funniest thing.  His manual dexterity is very good.

We looked at a couple books, then I lie down on the bed with him and sang a bit, and he fell asleep.  No tears at all, which was incredible.

Man do we love this little guy!  We are not looking forward to tomorrow, when his foster mother picks him up, but today absolutely exceeded anything we could have hoped for.

Trip 1, Day 3: Tests and meeting our son!

We woke up raring to go after another great night's sleep.  Then another tasty breakfast.  I am loving all the fresh fruit, and Jerry is still loving the great coffee.  Should I have titled this blog:  Eating our way across Honduras?

Ileana picked us up on schedule, and we headed over to the government offices where we were yesterday, this time to take a psychological test.  It is called the MMPI, a personality test that is used in the States, and which we took as part of putting together our dossier.  This version was slightly different -- I think it was the Spanish version of the test, that had been translated to English, because some of the terminology was a little different than American English.  Anyway, it was about 580 yes or no questions, and took quite a while to get through since we had to fill in those little bubbles with our number 2 pencils, especially since we were sitting in student desks like in high school.  When that was over, we had to answer some essay questions about our lives; maybe about ten of those.  Then Ileana translated for a while, and we were done!

Back to the hotel for lunch, and mentally trying to prepare to meet the new member of our family.  I was thinking this is got to be something of what it is like going to your own wedding when it is an arranged marriage.  This time, God was doing the arranging!

We packed up a few of the toys we had brought with us, and the list of questions we had prepared to ask his foster mother, and headed out the door to the orphanage.  Our son is not living at an orphanage but in foster care, but the orphanage is where the ladies that are in charge of foster care have their offices.  Within about ten minutes of our arrival, in walked our son in the arms of his foster mother.

It is so hard to even describe that moment.  It is surreal really.  Here is the moment we have been anticipating since we started this process nearly three years ago.  We have been waiting and waiting and waiting, and then there he is!

Instantly we were smitten.  As cute as he looked in the photograph that we had been given as part of his referral, he is a bazillion times cuter in person.  He is without a doubt the most adorable and the sweetest boy in the whole country of Honduras.  Just a precious precious face, and just the sweetest, calmest, most tranquil disposition.  We tried not to overwhelm him.  A few tears came instantly to my eyes, but I was able to regain my composure.  Thank you Lord for that.  I didn't want to scare the little honey.  He was sitting so sweetly on his foster mother's lap in a chair next to Jerry.  I was on the sofa nearby, but got up and sat as his feet, and we just looked at him.  We patted his back a few times, and rubbed the soft skin on his hands and arms, and he just looked at us.  I wonder what could have been going through his mind.  Obviously, there is no way to prepare a 20-month-old to meet his new parents.  Who knows what he could have thought.  Anyway, we just sat there looking at him, smiling at him, saying hello to him, and gently patting his back and arm.  And then we heard the most amazing words from Ileana.

"They said you can take him with you back to the hotel.  Would you like him until Saturday or Sunday?"

Huh???

Honestly, we were thinking we would only be able to play with him for a couple hours, there at the offices, or at a playground.  And then see him for a few hours at the hotel or a playground the next day, and again the day after that, always in the company of his foster mother because of his young age.  That is what we had been told.  So mentally, it was a big big surprise.  Fortunately, we had brought several toys and books, but no food for him or clothes.  Anybody following our steps, I would recommend bringing some clothes, etc, just in case.

Of course we said we wanted to take him with us -- malls are plentiful around here, and we would be able to purchase anything we needed for a couple days.  We decided to keep him until Saturday afternoon, since we would be flying out Sunday morning, and thought that it would make it too hectic if we had him until Sunday first thing in the morning, much as we would love to spend every minute with him.

Oh my goodness, were we excited!!  We got in the car with Ileana, the foster mother, and our son.  He started to cry a little bit -- I don't think he likes car rides very much.  I think they must be scary to a little guy.  His foster mother comforted him, and he quickly stopped crying.  We drove to a restaurant that had a playground inside, and started playing with him a little.  He was amazingly calm.  His foster mother was within sight, but even still, he was very calm.  We had handed him a ball at the offices, and he was still holding on to that.  We also pulled out some stacking cups, and he really liked those too.  We just kept playing with him, and eventually he gave us the sweetest smile.  Oh my heart.  What a honey pie.  Jerry and I each took turns asking the foster mother some questions, and then she got up and left.  Our son did not notice that she had walked out, but soon after we all got up to leave.  At that moment, he noticed that she was gone, and cried a bit.  I was able to comfort him, and I am surprised that he didn't cry more.  At that point, though, there were no more smiles, but we were so thrilled that we had seen one already.  We made it back to the hotel, Ileana dropped us off, then she headed to the mall for us for some pajamas, an outfit for tomorrow, formula, and a bottle.  Oh, and diapers and wipes.  Don't forget those.  We played with him some more, gave him a bottle, and read a book with him.  He was very intent on that book:  his sweet eyes were following everything on the page.  He started to cry some more, longer and heavier than he had in the car earlier.  Luckily we were able to comfort him, walking around and cuddling him, and also thanks in part to one of the books we brought.  I sat on the bed with him, looking at the book, and talking and singing very softly.  He fell asleep.  Amazing!  Unfortunately, I shifted too soon, and he woke up and started to cry again.  I started the walking and rocking routine again, followed by sitting on the bed and reading a book again.  And again, he fell asleep.  I stayed still for quite a while!  I was able to set him down next to me, and he stayed asleep.  For nearly twelve hours!!!!!

Trip 1, Day 2: The interviews

We woke up this morning after a very restful sleep.  Breakfast at the hotel was awesome:  eggs, fresh papaya and pineapple, bread, pastries, fresh orange juice, and Jerry had four cups of the best coffee he has ever had in his whole life!  My husband is a coffee drinker, and he was in coffee heaven today.  It was great to see him so happy over a cuppa joe!

Then our agency rep took us to the government offices to meet the psychologist and social worker who were going to interview us.  We were there from about 9:00 to about 12:30, meeting individually with each of them, along with a translator.  They asked us questions about all periods of our life, and even though their questions were very direct, and it is unusual to spend that much time just talking about yourself, they were very kind as well.  All in all, I enjoyed it.  It was not stressful at all, which was a big relief.  Ileana had told us not to worry about it, but of course you can't help but be a little n edge, but honedtly there was no need, and that was obvious from the very beginning of the interviews.  We were just talking and laughing and having a nice conversation.  Just unusual, as I said, because the conversation was all about me.

After that, we headed back to the hotel for a quick change, then Ileana drove us to Valle de Angeles, a very cute traditional town about forty minutes from Tegucigalpa.  The views were even more breathtaking from what we have in the city, and the pace was much more relaxed and peaceful.  We had a very delicious lunch at a traditional Honduran restaurant.  I am so surprised that there aren't any Honduran restaurants back home.  The food is really really tasty.  Similar to Mexican, but at the same time slightly different.  I had grilled fish with fried potatoes and salad and the best fresh lemonade in the world.  I am not kidding -- it was so so so tasty.  Jerry had grilled shrimp.  We are eating very well on this trip!! We also learned today that Honduras is the largest coffee exporter in the Americas, and I think their coffee is rated the highest quality too.  I'm sure Jerry would agree.  Their other top exports are bananas and shrimp and also a fair bit of tilapia.  Information curteous of Ileana.  After lunch, we strolled around town and did a bit of souvenir shopping.  I am not a big shopper, but I could have bought a lot here.  Very nice and beautiful things.  But of course we are limited in what we can bring back with us on the plane, so we just bought a little bit.  It was a great little trip -- I definitely could spend more time in this cute little town.

After shopping, we stopped for some more coffee (I had a pina colada frozen drink), and then drove back to the city.  We met a Canadian couple here at our hotel that just today finalized the adoption of a darling little boy.  They of course were super excited to be able to head back home, and I know at some point we will be at that stage too!  We've also met a Spanish couple that is on their first trip as well, just meeting their adorable little girl.

We skyped home again and heard about the boys' antics today.  Apparently there is a lot of wheeling dealing going on; can't say I'm too surprised!

Hey, it's almost time for dinner (we are definitely not going to go hungry around here), so I better end for the day.  Tomorrow we take our psychological tests, which like the interviews we had today are very similar to what we have already been through at home, but are required to do again.  Just part of the process.  We also get to meet our little boy tomorrow afternoon.  It is so exciting to contemplate.  We packed a bunch of toys and stuff to play with when we meet him, so hopefully something we packed will hit home!

Trip One, Day 1: We arrive!

We're here and at the hotel.  So excited that we are in the same city as our new little honey!

Ok, so here's how the day went:

Back up to last night:  we dropped off the boys with the Schaefers, and they immediately started having a good time!  Jerry and I on the other hand, were having to work to keep our countenance.  We survived though, and managed to pull out of the driveway without shedding any tears.  Yay for us!

Back home, set the alarm for 3:00 (yes, that is a.m.), and went to bed a teeny bit earlier than normal.  I was able to sleep, but poor Jerry had practically no shut-eye at all.  This was on top of not sleeping well the night before, so poor guy is working on very little sleep.  I, on the other hand, am a good sleeper.  I can pretty much sleep anywhere, anytime, and always get the good sleeper award.  Just a little free information for you.

Made it to the airport easy peasy, but thought we were at the grocery store there for a minute with all the self-service check-ins.  Another job bites the dust.  Good thing that trained guy flew the plane and not us!

No adventures in the air; everything went smoothly.  Wow -- talk about a fun landing in Tegus though!  Jerry had the window view and really enjoyed it.  From where I sat, there was a lot of banking right, banking left, dips, quick turns, and a whole lot of scenery passing by the windows extremely fast!!  I think I am glad I didn't have the window seat.  The g-force was rather intense on the runway too.   In case some of you don't know, pilots have to get a special certification to be able to fly in and out of this airport.  It's the second most dangerous airport in the world!  I don't know what the first is....I did ask though....

Absolutely gorgeous scenery.  Absolutely gorgeous.  Very mountainy right around the city; hence, the dangerous designation, but it really makes for some spectacular views.  It's the rainy season, so everything is green and flowery too.  So beautiful.

Our agency representative Ileana picked us up at the airport no problem.  It took quite a while to get to our hotel the Humuya Inn though -- some strikers were blocking a road with a nice little tire bonfire.  We tried to drive around the blockage, but then every other driver tried to do the same thing, so the jam just kept getting bigger and bigger and moved everywhere we tried to go.  It did give us plenty of time to chat with Ileana though, which was nice.  She is very friendly and very helpful.

Eventually we made it to the hotel, and it is really beautiful.  Just perfect for us.  Our room is wonderful with a large balcony.  I am on the balcony right now chillaxing in a lounge chair and blogging.  Jerry is trying to catch a few winks I think; poor guy.  They have a big central courtyard with lots of ceramic tile, and I didn't even have to close my eyes in order to imagine some little boys I know playing trucks or trains or Legos or dinosaurs or something in that courtyard -- they would love it.

We did stop for lunch at a Honduran-style restaurant at a nearby shopping mall.  Very tasty.  Nice looking mall too -- very American looking with several American restaurants and shops.  We joked that we had to come to Central America to go to a shopping mall, since we are rarely at a mall at home!

So, that was pretty much all of today worth noting.  All the caffeine I drank today is wearing off around the edges anyway, and I'm probably not being very interesting, so I'll sign off.  We're going to skype with the boys later -- hope that works out.  I miss them already.

Big day tomorrow!

Thankfulness

My post yesterday was already getting long, and I didn't want to go off in another area and make it even longer, so I left this part for today.  But really it fits on with the end of yesterday.  It is about being thankful.

Yes, I am already not looking forward to having to say goodbye (even for five days) to my sons here in order to go meet new little mister, and I am not looking forward to having to leave him (after just meeting him) to allow time for the adoption to be finalized, but the thing is:  I am so thankful that I am even in this position in the first place.  I am so blessed to be their mommy at all.

This whole life that I am living is a gift, and I am keenly aware of it.  I definitely took the long and winding road to marriage and parenthood, but I am so grateful that I am here now.  Due to a whole variety of circumstances that would make a whole other post, I waited a long time to meet my husband.  I was already well into my thirties at that point.  And when we did get married a couple years later, and we tried to start a family, it just didn't happen.  We spent a few years chasing fertility, but after a lot of months of nothing, and a lot of tears, and a lot of knee time, we came to the realization that perhaps God's plan for growing our family involved adoption.

That was seven years ago.  And now, not only am I wife to an awesome man and mother to two amazing boys that fill my life with joy, but I am also mommy to one more adorable boy that I will get my hands on very soon and who I'm sure will add even more joy to my joy.  I am filled with thankfulness for this rich and beautiful life.  Truly, my cup overflows.

'Tis the season

It's almost time for us to leave on our trip to meet our new little honey!  We are so excited to finally see him after waiting so long for this point.  So full of anticipation to see what he is like in person, not just on paper or in photo.  To see him run around.  To hear his voice.  To hear him squeal and laugh.  To play with him.  To kiss his sweet little cheeks.  To be in the same spot as him and breathe the same air.

We've made our flight reservations, made our hotel reservations, we've collected all the additional documents we need to bring with us, and we've made a list of questions to ask about our boy.  We've read all the required books, and taken all the required training.  We're just about all packed up, including the books and toys for our little guy to play with while we're there and the photo book of our family that we've made for him, and we've bought snacks for the flights.

We're just about set, except for one thing.  The hardest thing we've still got to do.  We've got to say goodbye to our sons here for the five days we are gone.  I am not looking forward to that.  AT.  ALL.

It's not like we didn't know this was coming.  We've known for nearly three years that this season would come.  But now it is reality, and it is just going to be difficult, no question about it.  They will be in wonderful hands, I am totally confident of that, and their day-to-day will be much the same, since school is now in session.  In fact, they will probably have a total blast:  going swimming, eating popcorn, and playing playing playing.  And that helps me so much knowing that they will be well-taken-care-of.

But on the other hand, it is the beginning of the toughest season.  Those who have adopted before or who are in process will be familiar with this.  From the moment that we say goodbye to our boys here, until we are back home after our pickup trip with our baby boy (whenever that might be), our family will not be all together.  I can already feel my heart being pulled in different directions, with these boys here, and my little one there.  Then when Jerry and I are there meeting our baby, our other boys will be here.  Then when we are back here, our little one will be there without us.  And that will more than likely me more intensely difficult than it is even now, because we will just have met him, and will have experienced all that love for him right there in person for a quick little trip, and then we have to leave him, not knowing when we will be able to return.  It's hard to think about.  But then at some point in two or three months or so, we will hear word that we can take our final trip there (for four to six weeks) and fly back home with our new son.  And after that, we will all be home, all together.  All five of us.  And that thought sustains me.

In my prayers lately, I have just been sitting at God's feet, and asking for his help getting the five of us through this season.  And when I say "get through," I don't mean whining and moaning and "woe is me" getting through.  I mean doing it with a joyful heart while in the middle of it with love for those around me.  On my own, on our own, it is not possible to do this.  I'm pretty tough, but this is not possible.  With confidence in the grace of God though, and knowing with certainty that we are doing His will for our lives and our family, we can.

Can I please ask for your prayers for this season in our lives?  And for prayers for those mothers who are forced to, or feel they are forced to, leave their children for a whole variety of circumstances?  God has been growing my heart for these parents as well.  I am fortunate.  I know that our situation is temporary:  we will be called back to pick him up, we just don't know when, and then we will be together.  Many other parents have to be apart from their children, and do not have that relief.  Please remember them in your prayers.

My fortune

I don't do horoscopes, or fortune telling, or reading tea leaves, or things of that ilk, but we went out to a Chinese restaurant on Sunday with the family to celebrate my nephew's birthday, and I got the greatest fortune in my fortune cookie:

"This year your highest priority will be your family."

AweSOME!!!  Now that one I can agree with!!!

Twenty months old!

Beautiful boy,

You are twenty months old today!  When I close my eyes, I can see your precious face.  I have looked at your photograph so many times that your adorableness is always before me.  I am so so so looking forward to seeing you in person.   We have waited so long for you, but it won't be very much longer now, and I am thrilled that another month-iversary won't pass before I have been able to be right there with you and kiss your chubby cheeks.  I know that if I said all these things to you now, you wouldn't be able to understand them, even if I said them in my limited Spanish, as you are still so young, but someday maybe you will read these words and be able to get some picture of how much you are loved already and how special you are to me, to your daddy, and to your brothers, who also can't wait to be with you.  Everyone we know is so excited and is looking forward to the time when they can meet you too!

Twenty months old!  I can remember so vividly what twenty months old looked like in your brothers.  Mario was twenty months old when Erik came home into our family.  I have the tape of him running through my mind:  what he was doing and the short sentences that he could say.  I remember how he thought he was able to jump and leap, but his chubby little legs weren't making it off the ground.  And Erik at twenty months was running around like crazy and making us laugh at his antics and jokes like "mm-mm bug."  They were definitely different from each other, and I know that you will be different from either of them as well, but I also know that I would fight tigers for you, as I would for them.

You are my son, and I will love you forever.

On the day you were born

Sweet little son of mine,

I have been trying to figure out what exactly we were doing when you took your first breath in this big big world.  I have found one thing that is so precious that I was doing on the actual day of your birth.  I signed up for the yahoo group for families adopting from Honduras!  Isn't that amazing!  A friend of mine, another Honduran adoptive momma, had told me about it, and so I signed up!  On the day you were born, I was actually reading the experiences of other moms and dads who had adopted or were in the process of adopting children from Honduras.  I think that is such an incredible connection to you, and I love how God touched the heart of my friend to tell me about this group and how He also touched my heart so that I signed up for the group on the very day that you were born!

And here's one more thing.  This photo.  It was actually taken two days before you were born, but it awfully close to the day you made your big arrival.  Here are your big brothers, just waiting for you:

We attended a birthday party for Baby Jesus at the Pauline Books and Media bookstore!!  We do this every year, or at least every year since Mario was a baby.  You'll get your turn too!  Mommy's favorite part is dressing up in costumes and getting photos taken with Baby Jesus in the manger.  Mario (the king) and Erik (the shepherd) generally appease Mommy so that they can then go to the back room and get birthday cake and juice!  Looking at this picture brings tears to my eyes, knowing that at this moment, you could have been the baby lying in the manger.  And there are your brothers:  anticipating your birth and rejoicing with Baby Jesus at the same time.  God is so good to us.

We have our travel dates!

It just gets better and better!  I was practically airborne when I heard from our adoption agency on Friday, letting us know the appointment dates that have been set up for us at IHNFA.  Less than three weeks and we get to see our newest little guy!! We made our flight arrangements, made reservations at the Humuya Inn, and have been getting the rest of our preparations taken care of before the trip.  So much to do!  We need to have updated letters from our doctor, recent employment letters, and recent police department checks, so I'm going to be running around this week trying to take care of those things.  The documents must be notarized and apostilled too, so I'll be making some trips to the Secretary of State's office as well.  I also need to finish up a little photo book I'm making for the little guy (one that he won't be able to rip apart or chew through), get some other items we need, and take care of several other details before the trip.  Lots to do, but it will be so great to see our new honey in person, and hold him, and snuggle with him, and just breathe him in, that I don't mind anything.  It is so worth it.

It's still kind of surreal to think that we have a new little son and that we will be traveling very soon to meet him.  We have been waiting for this for over 2 1/2 years, praying for this child for over 2 1/2 years, and that we are finally at the stage where we are very close to seeing him with our very own eyes, is just almost hard to believe.

I have been noodling around in my brain trying to figure out what we were doing on the day he was born.  I don't know as of yet, but I am really interested in seeing if we can figure it out.  He was born on Monday, December 13, 2010, and at that point in the game, our dossier had been submitted to IHNFA and was under review.  We had already heard the request for the actual test results from our physicals and had submitted those reports.  We had not yet received word that they wanted more information in our psychological reports.  We were just in a waiting period.  So no real clues there.  Mario was 5 1/2 and in kindergarten, and Erik was 4 1/2 and in pre-K.  Because it was a Monday, Erik would have been off school that day, so we were likely doing some fun activity.  That year, I was room mother for Mario's class, and given that it was the week before Christmas, we were probably getting ready for the class Christmas party.  The weekend before I would have been singing in our big Christmas concert as part of the Archdiocesan choir, something that we had been preparing for for a couple months.  The concert itself was wonderful -- a real highlight for me.  But on December 13th, I would have been all done with the concert, would have turned in all our Christmas music, and hadn't yet received the music for our next event.  Also, I was part of the team that was preparing for our parish's first women's ACTS retreat, which was tremendous.  Certainly, I would have been thinking about my part in the retreat and preparing for that.  What else?  It was the day before my birthday.  But I can't pinpoint anything in particular.  I think I am going to have to review old calendar entries and any old emails that I might still have so see if there are any other clues.  And for the record, nine months prior, we were in the home study process.  We had had the second meeting with our social worker, but had not yet received the final report.  Which means that God had been preparing our hearts for him, even before he was conceived.  Is that amazing or what?  I'm tearing up just thinking about it.

We're coming, little sweetie!  We love you so much, and we're coming!!!