Earlier today, I was listening to Mass on EWTN radio and had one of those strong experiences that the Mass readings were speaking directly to me. It wasn't an obvious connection like it was a month ago with Romans 8 (our adoption by God) and Psalm 68 (God defending the orphan). The first reading was from 1 Maccabees (the rededication of the Temple after the Maccabean revolt drove out the Greeks and their pagan gods), and the gospel reading was about Jesus driving out the money changers and cleansing the Temple. 1 Maccabees is so inspiring: I love to hear the stories of the Jewish people of that time standing strong and facing death rather than breaking the Covenant. Ninety year old Eleazar witnessing to the importance of not giving scandal, the widow facing the loss of her seven sons but encouraging them to follow God, her youngest son saying to the executioner, "What are you waiting for?!" Mattathias and his sons leaving all their possessions and fleeing to the desert rather than abandoning their faith. Then Judas Maccabeus and his brothers finally succeeding in driving out the Greeks, removing the statue of Zeus from the Temple, and purifying it. Awesome stuff.
Then during the homily, I was most definitely inspired: I am the temple of the Holy Spirit. The same zeal with which the Jewish people drove out pagan practices from the Temple and purified it for right worship, the same zeal with which Jesus drove out commerce from the Temple so that it was a place of prayer, God wants to apply to me so that I am truly a temple of the Holy Spirit. Ok, Lord, what are the idols you are trying to cleanse me of?
International adoption is most definitely difficult. We started this adoption process over two years ago, and have been on the wait list for a year. Affording the expenses was challenging, assembling the dossier was time-consuming, and waiting is the hardest of all. Basically for an entire year, the process has been completely out of our control. And we've been ok with that since we know that ultimately God is in charge, and He is going to bring about the exact perfect addition to our family. There have been long stretches of time when it has been difficult to get information on what is happening because that is just how it is with international adoption sometimes, and we've accepted that too. Ultimately, God is in charge, and He knows what is going on, even if we don't. And there have been times when I've just plain been a little nervous that something is going to go wrong, like our dossier is going to be forgotten about and someone else is going to get the referral that should have been ours, or there will suddenly be a moratorium on international adoptions, or the rules will be changed and we will be ineligible to adopt, or who knows what else. And then, "Fear not!" I remember that God is most definitely in charge. He is the One that inspired us to start this adoption, He is the One that is making it possible, He is the One that is sustaining us during the wait, and He is the One that is going to bring it to fulfillment in the most perfect way, whatever that will be. God has taught me so much with this adoption. I know without a shadow of a doubt that we are on the right path and that God is leading us.
So, what's left? What idols are left to be driven out? Cleanse me, Lord.